Graduation

Today I graduated from college. That's pretty weird to say.
Do I feel different? Nope.

In fact, right now, I am sitting in the living room with Audrey watching what else but a documentary (about Tornados. We just finished North Korea). This is a typical scene in my apartment.

The only difference is that I now have a diploma sitting on my desk, and the room in my apartment that used to belong to Nicole Poston is now completely empty :(

Hallelujah, YOU carried me every day, YOU carried me all the way. By the Grace of God and nothing else, I made it through nursing school. What's next? That's a great question. I have options, I have a possibility. But still nothing definite. Praying for guidance and confidence in this next step, and as the pieces start to come together, I am growing excited about this next step in life.

Also, I went to 55 Exchange yesterday. I told the guy working that my Clemson Bucket List specifically said that I had to try every flavor, halfway joking. He then grabbed a handful of sample spoons and started to hand them to me. Made my day.

My Clemson Bucket List

My freshman year, I started to make a list of everything I wanted to do at Clemson, or just as a college student in general, and it's been a work in progress over the last four years. Some things I have added just because I did them and they were cool, so I wanted to be able to cross them off. Other things are still in the works.
 (That's what the summer is for)

Sit front row for a football game: Done. Senior year, the day we beat Auburn and destroyed their winning streak. That was a good day

Be on ESPN during a sporting event: Done. a couple times actually. Previously mentioned Auburn game, and Duke basketball game sophomore year.


Camp out for tickets: Done. I always did block seating for football, just because that was the last complicated way to do it. I don't really like basketball, but somehow I got roped into a basketball ticket group sophomore with a bunch of Crosspoint people. One night I camped out with Karen, Josh Dorrity, and Pam. It was freezing.

Walk around the Botanical Gardens: Done, multiple times. Not very exciting, unless you like plants.

Try every flavor at 55 exchange: Not done. I am indecisive. I find a flavor I like, then I never try anything new. Plus, the flavors change. Not my fault.

Spend an afternoon at Y Beach: Done. Many times, but this afternoon, Jesy, Nali and I took Laura because she had never been swimming in Lake Hartwell.

Hammock in the Botanical Gardens: Done, with Elizabeth Hughes, but then we found out it's illegal.

"Visit" the old Newry Mill: Nope. I was going to go Junior year, but my dear friend Jesy Cordle was visiting and she didn't want to. Turns out, my friends who went got busted by the cops. Then I decided I was okay with not going.

Eat at Mac's Diner: Done. Love this place. It became a staple roommate date Senior year after football games, because it was the one of the few places we could go without getting into crazy football traffic. Plus, they had cable

Run through the sprinklers on Bowman field: Done. Once by accident, when I was riding my bicycle freshman year. Not fun. The most memorable time was with Emily Clardy. Fun.

Explore downtown Pendleton: Not yet, but a definite summer goal.

Swim in the reflection pond: Not done. Want to do. Need to do. Especially right now, because they just cleaned it out. But I need somebody to go with me.

Sign the secret book: I know how and where, just haven't done it yet. This is Laura's and my goal for next week.

Go inside every building on campus: Also a no. Forgot about this one. Maybe I'll do it this summer.

Drive on Roller Coaster Road: SO. MUCH. FUN. especially when Palms' slushies are included afterwards :)

Go in the Monsoon Room: Done. Managed to get this one done sophomore year before they put the new lock on.

Go in the Tillman Bell Tower: YES! I took Music 325 and learned how to play the bells fall of sophomore year.

Go to Split Creek Farms: They have the best cheese ever.

Take a road trip "somewhere exciting": I don't know what qualifies as exciting. but I've done a couple road trips, so we'll count them.

Go inside the secret tunnels: No. but I also want to graduate, so we'll save that one.

Hike to the top of Table Rock: Two different times. Once with friends sophomore year and the other time with my family and Nali  senior year

Watch the sunrise from Pretty Place: Been to pretty place, yes. Sunrise, no.

Eat at the ESSO: Yep. Senior year, with my clinical group

Go to an away game: Senior year, Laura and I went to the ACC Championship Game in Charlotte. That qualifies as a road trip AND an away game. two birds, one stone.

Go Trick or Treating at the President's House: Halloween, Senior Year. We were keeping Nali that week, and dressed her up as a lion. We were a tiger and a bear. Lions and tigers and bears (oh my)

Slip and Slide on Bowman in the rain: The first week of freshman year, I met Kathleen and Andrew at BCM. It was raining really hard when we walked back, so we took a detour and played in the mud. That's how we became friends.

Sit on the lap of the Thomas Greene Clemson statue: Eventually.

Tour Fort Hill and Ashtabula: After graduation?

Rub Howard's Rock: roommates, Clemson ring included

Take an exciting leisure skill class: I think Shotgun Shooting and Whitewater Kayaking count?


Jump off the tallest rock at the Rock Quarry: Many, many times. 

Learn all the words to the Alma Mater: Only the words that we sing at football games :(

Go inside Old Stone Church: Not yet. Working on it.

the beginning of the end (or end of the beginning)

Eventually, I will get to the point where I don't feel the need to start every post with "It's been so long since I've posted." Eventually. Not there yet.

Today was my last day in the Progressive Care Unit at Oconee Medical Center. It was definitely a bittersweet shift. On one hand, it is SO great to know that I am that much closer to the end of nursing school. Two weeks from today, you better believe I will be snatching that diploma out of James F. Barker's hands. But on the flip side, that is one step closer to being thrown into the next couple months of complete uncertainty. I still don't have a job, still don't know where I am living after July 31st, and to stretch it to melodramaticism, have no idea what I am doing with my life.

My decision to work at Snowbird last summer was not one that I took lightly. I would consider it to be the most prayer-covered and faith-driven choice I have ever made - more than what college to go to, which major to pick, or any of the really significant stuff. I knew that turning down one guaranteed externship and a pretty good shot at another would probably impact my job market. I still don't know the extent to which it will, but I am sure it may cause some frustration in the near future.

What I thought I wanted a month ago and what I think I want now are two very different things. I didn't expect that. For the majority of my clinical career, I have been completely sold on the ER. I love the trauma, the excitement, the pace, the adrenaline, the variety, and the unpredictability that the Emergency Department brings. But over the last five weeks, I have really grown to love the environment of the PCU more than I ever imagined I would. I don't know if this was meant to make me more open to whatever new place God was going to take me next, or if He is going to work it out for me to be able to stay in this specific place. I am hoping for the latter, but increasingly open to both options.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DorjH_O-20g

This is the song that was playing as I got into my car tonight. I'd never heard it before, but it's called "Rest in the Hope" by Karyn Williams. It was such an awesome reminder that whatever happens, wherever I end up, God IS in control


You are the truth that never changes
You are the love that came to save us
I am Yours.
Even through all my fear and sorrow
Facing a new unknown tomorrow
I am sure that I'm going to rest in the hope
that I'm Yours.

jumble

It has been brought to my attention that I don't blog much anymore. The truth is, I don't spend very much time in class this semester, and that's where most of my blogging motivation comes from.

I started filling out a real life job application today. Whether or not I will submit it is debatable, but it was a scary yet strangely empowering feeling to know that I get to choose where I go from here. While I do have people who's input is important to me in this decision, I am the one who ultimately decides where I will be in six months. I could be on the other side of the country if I wanted to (key words being "if I wanted to"). Truth is, I don't know what's coming in the next year, but I am thrilled to start on this new adventure of trusting God and being along for the ride.

I took my last college final ever today. I expected some sort of epiphany afterwards, but really all I feel is tired and ready for a nap (and spring break). Practicum starts two weeks from today, and I have yet to find out my placement. It's frustrating not being able to plan anything yet - I don't know if I'll be working days, nights, weekends, weekdays, which weekdays. Somebody give me some answers.